CNO’s Email Locked Out After Getting 7MB Weather Report Attachment

“Motherfucker! God fucking dammit I hate my husband and children!” Screamed Admiral Biscotti after an O-2 METOC Officer sent her an email that included a weather report with a 7MB attachment. The massive attachment completely crashed the entire Pentagon’s Navy NIPR services, including Microsoft Teams, rendering the entire fighting force inert, much like you.

“How the fuck am I supposed to get real and get better when I can’t even get to my fucking inbox!” The admiral said as she threw her coffee at the closest IP Officer she could find. “Fuck you COMMO!”

At press time, Admiral Biscotti was seen sobbing as she was forced to delete all the family dog pictures her mom had sent her in order to free up space. The dog died last month.