Female Officer Livid to Find Out She’s Been Accidentally Fucking Enlisted Dude

In an absolutely shocking turn of events, a female naval officer realized the tattoo-clad dude she met line dancing is, in fact, enlisted.

“I had absolutely NO idea he was enlisted!” LT Jess Pounded confessed to her friend over an Aperol spritz while wearing some earrings she borrowed from her roommate six years ago. “Trust me when I say I wouldn’t have let him fuck me like that four days a week for six months had I known!” LT Pounded went on.

At press time, LT Pounded was caught changing her Hinge radius to one mile as she Ubered to Coronado.